Further proof that democracy is retarded

According to democracy, Vodka is the dominant spirit. I would have agreed . . . until I turned 17 and discovered other drinks besides Mountain Dew and vodka.

If you’re starting a bar, all you really need is gin and scotch. If you want something else, add Rye or Bourbon. As for liqueurs, all you need is vermouth – both sweet and dry. Spend the money for the nicer vermouth.

And for God’s sake, if you have vodka in your house, donate it to some thirsty high-schoolers.


14 Responses to Further proof that democracy is retarded

  1. Few drinks can compare with a good gin and tonic and some lime.

    • Ariston says:

      In the warmer months. There’s something slightly absurd or decadent about it in the winter; it seems to be in defiance of reality, which is one of those attitudes that should be held only in moderation. (Perhaps the Hendrick’s English cucumber version is acceptable.) I shift to rye & bourbon–based drinks in winter; I’ve never developed a love for scotch, though I appreciate the good stuff.

      My go–to for summer gin, tonic & lemon oils (no reactionary should use lime) is Bluecoat. It’s very crisp and more aromatic than the standard brands.

      I would make two exceptions to our host’s liqueurs rule: Campari is a necessity (there’s nothing quite like it— and the Negroni is the other great gin–based summer drink) as well as a ginger liqueur, which is marvelously flexible.

      • Foseti says:

        I like Bluecoat as well – especially in gin and tonic.

        What do you use the ginger liqueur in?

        I haven’t had a negroni in a while. Maybe I’ll try one now . . .

      • josh says:

        “I shift to rye & bourbon–based drinks in winter”.

        Damn straight. Because you are a fucking American. What the hell, Foseti? How many great cultural achievements do we even have in this country?

      • Foseti says:

        Heh. I actually do the same, but my intake of scotch goes up as well.

        If you have to choose one, I still think scotch is the right choice, regardless of the number of American cultural achievements.

      • Ariston says:

        Uses for ginger liqueur:

        • It goes well with bourbon. (I mean, don’t use it on the top–shelf, I’m not insane, but the chilled liqueur 1:1.5 with Knob Creek or something? Great.)
        • Add it to g&t sometimes for a change.
        • 2:3 liqueur to gin— a martini variation that I’ve never seen a woman dislike, that lacks the juices and cloying sweetness of most cocktails pushed on women. The rule: If you won’t drink it, she shouldn’t drink it.
        • I’m not a rum drinker (too sweet), but it goes really well with it and should be experimented with in a number of summer rum drinks.
        • It’s the best liqueur to add to hot tea for those days (mornings) in the winter where you feel like your head is in a vise. Since sinus infections usually are accompanied with some stomach upset, the ginger is also legitimately medicinal.

        Scotch, Rye, Irish Whiskey, Bourbon. Any man who doesn’t have a foot in at least one of those camps shouldn’t be trusted, but whatever banner you raise highest shouldn’t matter. Scotch is the king in some ways, because it is the one of the above that should never be mixed. Not because all of it is so high quality you don’t want to mix it, but because everything that isn’t high quality tastes like dirt. (My grandfather—who was an alchoholic, yes—used to drink cheap, cheap scotch directly out of the plastic handle. In retrospect, I am impressed both with how disgusting this is and in his dedication.) I go back and forth between bourbon and rye, especially as I really haven’t experienced the best of the latter. My first introduction to the Manhattan, in college via a friend’s father, was terrible, but I like the drink now that I learned you need to use rye and keep your vermouth fresh; it may be my favorite cocktail now. However, my first drink ever was Wild Turkey (straight), at a friend’s high school graduation party (thanks Brad’s uncle, wherever you are), so bourbon will always hold a special place in my heart. (Also, I’m a Kentuckian.)

      • The hell is this about reactionaries not using lime? Some of the greatest imperialism in the last 300 years was powered by lime.

  2. Hannah Jacobs says:

    Retarded doesn’t mean stupid, unless of course you’re still in middle school. Please don’t run and quote the dictionary. You’ll just have to trust me on this one.

  3. anon666 says:

    Slavic adults drink vodka.

  4. Will S. says:

    Non-massed-produced vodkas, made in small batches in traditional copper stills, can be quite flavourful, and distinct, depending on the types of grain used.

    But most vodka is mass-produced swill, good only for mixing.

    BTW, here‘s the most insane new vodka beverage I’ve ever heard of.

  5. nydwracu says:

    I don’t drink with people who drink vodka, unless they’re Slavic, in which case they have an excuse. This effectively means I don’t drink with students at my college, or at least the popular ones; vodka is the drink of the higher-status here, from honors students to football players. I would prefer to avoid anyone with such terrible taste or such desperation to get hammered.

    My liquor of choice is whiskey in America and ouzo in Europe, but considering the different social dynamics in Europe, I tend not to hit the liquor much there; I’ll stick to cider or a good wheat beer.

  6. James says:

    Foseti+commenters, you need to stop posting about drinks.

    1. It’s just signalling to each other how sophisticated you are. Signalling how right-on they are is what leftists do.

    2. To us Brits, this stuff is all obvious, so the signalling actually makes you look unsophisticated.

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